Friendly Neighborhood Sasshole

Belly dance and (a)sexuality

thejeniverse:

I never thought I would have to explain to asexuals that belly dancing is NOT inherently sexual or seductive and then have them not get it.  While I probably shouldn’t have assumed that they wouldn’t be influenced by stereotypes, we’re always discussing how a particular fictional relationship doesn’t have to be seen as sexual or how you can appreciate someone’s beauty without being attracted to them or aroused.  In spite of this, someone brought up belly dance as a way to “engage” a partner in an asexual-sexual relationship.  I tried to clarify what it is, yet I continued to see comments about how it’s particularly appealing to sexuals. 

I could go on and on about how belly dance is not sexual, unless you consider all dance forms sexual.  There are some great articles about belly dance and sexuality (and how it relates to Orientalism and misogyny) so I won’t say too much except the following: 
1. A belly dance routine can be seductive, but so can a ballet or Irish step dance routine. 
2. You can find a belly dance erotic, but that doesn’t mean it was the dancer’s intentions (so you better be careful what you say to her). 
3. Some people may choose to learn it to feel sexier or to entertain their partner, and that’s fine.  However, when you start actually studying it, you learn the rich history and community.  The movements are not what’s sexy; it’s the confidence and love of your body that is.

I don’t know which people insisted to you that bellydancing is sexual, but asexuals are not a monolith. And it likely has nothing to do with their being asexual that they might have those (common and ignorant) ideas about bellydance.

This entry was published on 10 June 2012 and has 46 note(s).
It was tagged: asexuality, belly dance,

Notes

  1. captionread reblogged this from lizziegoneastray
  2. lavenderbat reblogged this from thejeniverse
  3. equalseleventhirds reblogged this from greenchestnuts and added:
    Agreed! I don’t know how to belly dance, mostly because I don’t know anywhere I could learn, but it’s definitely not...
  4. greenchestnuts reblogged this from lizziegoneastray and added:
    Reblogging for Lizzie’s commentary.
  5. lifeandfreedom reblogged this from lizziegoneastray and added:
    YES. THIS. Lizzie, you are flawless. (also leaving the less personal but still very relevant of your tags)
  6. minato-rise-up reblogged this from lizziegoneastray
  7. lizziegoneastray reblogged this from metapianycist and added:
    Actually, as an asexual bellydancer myself, I am SO GLAD someone else has made these points. I do not see bellydancing...
  8. candyelephants said: You’d think asexuals of all people would understand that sexy =/= sex ??????????
  9. terribledeathwhinny reblogged this from midnight-naiad-under-the-sea and added:
    And it’s not like there’s just one form of belly dancing. There’s tribal and folkloric and Egyptian and Turkish. And yes...
  10. midnight-naiad-under-the-sea reblogged this from thejeniverse and added:
    This. Yes, some people find belly dance to be sexy, heck sometimes I even find myself sexually attracted to dancers,...
  11. spacecourier reblogged this from thejeniverse
  12. msjanetweiss reblogged this from ilove-bellydance
  13. itshalalcuzisaidbismillah reblogged this from ilove-bellydance and added:
    I never considered it to be sexual. If my family even thought it to be, they wouldn’t have let me since I was little nor...
  14. sinesbro reblogged this from ilove-bellydance
  15. reflexion-des-mondlichts reblogged this from ilove-bellydance
  16. ilove-bellydance reblogged this from goldenheartedrose
  17. goldenheartedrose reblogged this from metapianycist and added:
    So much this. We are not a monolith, and it wouldn’t have even occurred to me to consider belly dancing “sexy”.
  18. metapianycist reblogged this from thejeniverse and added:
    I don’t know which people insisted to you that bellydancing is sexual, but asexuals are not a monolith. And it likely...
  19. thejeniverse posted this

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